Drama-Free Dad Jokes

Everyone knows about Karl Marx. But they forget his sister, Anya. An incredible athlete they mention to start every race.

My grandfather didn't fight in two world wars for these messed up politics. He missed one by 100 years.

I didn't drop your steak! Now, it's ground beef.

You can't trust large trees. They're too shady.

A person should always ask for context before explaining "penetrating gaze."

I recently got a new fridge for my girlfriend. Not sure it was a fair trade.

As a magician was walking down the street, he turned into a grocery store. Well, that's show biz!

Old MacDonald's official title is the C.I.E.I.O.

I saw a hive once, with no exit. It was un-bee-leave-able.

It's a good thing mummies don't take vacations. I'd rather not see them unwind.

I just learned to make Indian flatbread! But I can't tell anyone. I signed a Naan disclosure agreement.