Classic Comedy

     Hey there, folks! Are y'all doing okay? Nice, nice. Listen, we got a great show for ya, lotsa laughs. Let me introduce your host for tonight, Heinrich Ferguson!

        Good evening, good people. A funny thing happened on the way here. I met a three legged dog. Apparently, he was looking for the man who shot his paw.

    Off to stage left, a drummer with horned rim glasses makes a rim-shot. (Ba-bump-fssh.)

    Thanks , Harold. Yeah , so, apparently, one island nation has been trying to figure out how to ban sunrises. It would seem as if Greece is tough on dawn.

    At this, Harold smiles, and shakes his head.

     Okay, mister. I'm doing my best out here. You got any funnier material?

     Harold smiles again. Oh, man. You're fine. But now you mention it, I do have just one.

     Sigh All right, Harold. Let's hear it.

          Okay, Okay. My parents were shocked by my playing with electrical cords. After which, I got grounded. And these days, I conduct myself much better.

     Not bad, not bad. Did you folks like that? Yeah, we aim to please. Just like William Tell.  If that reference went over your heads, I'd take another shot at it, but I'm fresh out of arrows.

     Heh, nice! (Ba-bum-fssh!)

     Thanks again, Harold.  Well, folks, it's getting late, but I got one more for ya. A Baptist, a Pentecostal, and a Catholic all died at the same time. They got to the pearly gates, and Peter showed them each to their areas. The Baptist got led to a buffet, full of fried chicken and casseroles. The Pentecostal found his friends in a Grammar and Semantics seminar. And lastly, the Catholic was led to a group doing Jazzercize, accompanied by bells. 

     Well, that's all the time we have. You folks were great. Be sure and tip your server, and come back real soon. Gnight!